How to Boost Your Confidence

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Pretty much everybody loves Jennifer Lopez, and- let’s be honest- what’s not to love?! Between her awesome hit songs, dance moves, and kick-ass style, it’s easy to see why she’s sold over 40 million albums and has a net worth of $320 billion. But have you ever stopped to think about why J.Lo is so successful? Because, as we all know, it’s possible to be pretty, talented, and totally undiscovered. So, what’s J.Lo’s secret? Here’s a hint: it has everything to do with body language.  

Paparazzi Have Been Over-analyzing J. Lo’s Every Move for Quite Some Time

You’ve probably noticed how tabloids are always analyzing celeb body language, but have you ever wondered why? Sometimes, it’s to get the inside scoop on potential relationships or figure out what a star is thinking. Case in point, People Magazine’s history of analyzing the body language involved in the long, long list of J. Lo’s romantic relationships through the years. But what else are they looking for? And how do they know when they’ve found it?

Well, when it comes to getting the scoop on the love, one prime example is an article published in Women’s Health Magazine, analyzing the behavior of- guess who!- J.Lo. That article, entitled, “Jennifer Lopez and Alex Rodriguez Body Language – What It Reveals” takes a look at J. Lo and A-Rod’s body language to explain why they are a happy couple. They draw their conclusions in part from behavior witnessed at a recent Hollywood gala event, where J. Lo is seen looking adoringly at her man. He, in turn, looks pretty happy to be J. Lo’s main squeeze, and also clears the way for her when they are walking down the street, surrounded by paparazzi.  Finally, in another example of romantic body language between the two stars, J. Lo leans into her man, sharing an intimate moment amidst the paparazzi chaos.

J. Lo’s Body Language Conveys Power and Strength

But analyzing body language can be an important tool for doing more than just gathering gossip. In fact, J.Lo can teach you some awesome secrets to unlocking the power of confident nonverbal communication in your own life! Curious? Just keep reading! One helpful tip in beginning to decipher the secrets to body language can be found in an article by Forbes. This piece identified the top ten behaviors associated with powerful nonverbal communication in the workplace. Among them are good eye contact, a strong handshake, effective gesturing, and an authoritative posture and work presence.  And if you’ve seen J.Lo’s recent interview with LinkedIn, then you can see how she exemplifies all of these characteristics, especially when she explains her success with the statement, “Failure is not falling down and making a mistake, or choosing the wrong movie or doing the wrong thing at the wrong time.  It’s stopping. […] Not continuing forward is failure.  Not keeping going.”

In this video interview, as J. Lo relates the struggles of making it to Hollywood as a college dropout, we see that her body language could not be better.  Powerful gesturing, attentive gaze, and an overall strong physical presence put her at the top of her game, where she has remained for over two decades. It also shows us that she understands the importance of perfecting all aspects of your physical presence more than anyone, as she has had to leverage her nonverbal cues and communication to work her way up the ranks. For her, realizing one’s worth is something that people, especially women, do not do enough of in this world. Confidence in one’s abilities, J. Lo explains with her powerful, strong body language, is not encouraged enough in today’s world.  “I think now and in this moment in time and this day and age,” she explains, “[women] need to understand their worth and value as well as what they bring to the table. And need to own the things they do as well.”

“Power Posing” for Greater Confidence and Power

J. Lo’s powerful physical presence is an example of what social psychologist and former Harvard Professor Amy Cuddy calls “power posing.”

What is power posing, you might ask? Well, it consists of utilizing expansive physical gestures which make use of the space around an individual and boosts their sense of personal power. And when we project power and confidence, it invites others to perceive us as being more powerful in turn.  In her now-famous TED talk, Cuddy explains that, according to a Harvard study, those who used power posing techniques were more successful in mock interviews than those who did not utilize these principles.

If you’re dying to try some out now- and we knew you would be!- here are some sample power poses you can try.  One example Cuddy suggests can be found in this Inc. article and it’s called the “Wonder Woman” pose. Although you can totally check out the article to learn more about what it looks like and how to do it, chances are you’ve seen before, because it looks a lot like the pose that many actresses and singers- J. Lo, anyone?- demonstrate on the catwalk. So, to do the Wonder Woman pose, all you have to do is:

  • Stand with feet apart
  • Place hands on hips
  • Tilt chin upward

Jennifer Lopez recently sported a variation of this pose on the catwalk at the 2018 Met Gala.  Red Carpet Fashion Awards, a blog, described the look as having “an unorthodox, super-heroine edge.  Yet, she stayed true to everything we’d expect in a J. Lo look – sexy, strong, and slit to there.”

Cuddy recommends the Wonder Woman pose in discussions with higher-ups at work because it can help to boost not only our internal perception of our own power but influence how your boss might perceive you as well. The magic behind these power poses, Cuddy argues, is that by changing our behaviors, we change our attitudes at the same time. And if you’re looking for another tip from Cuddy, check this out. The next time you’re in end-stage negotiations of a deal, “plant your hands on the table and lean forward.”  This position, which Cuddy says is reminiscent of the super-imposing Lyndon B. Johnson, can demonstrate that you are engaged and dominant.

Ready to try these out in the office now? Go for it! And to quickly recap, just remember that, to present yourself as a dominant person, you want to:

  1. Smile less often
  2. Touch the other person frequently, but in an authoritative manner
  3. Keep your head up
  4. Lower and sometimes frown your brows when you encounter something you didn’t want to hear
  5. Keep it calm and relaxed
  6. Use the space around you freely- let your hands fly around you as you talk.

The Bottom Line

Although you should be careful not to copy J.Lo too much- any average Joe trying too hard to rock a movie star pose will seem comical- overall, these tricks should absolutely work for you. But if what you’re really looking for is a way to boost your success and confidence, you can head over to my site, for life coaching and confidence training! I’ve helped thousands of people just like you to unlock their full potential and I can do it for you too! Wondering how? For the full story, you’ll have to check out my site, but basically… I teach you how to use your body language to sell more products and services- no matter what line of work you’re in! I’ll show you how to make a greater impact and skyrocket your influence even if you hate public speaking or feel awkward in front of a camera! If that sounds like what you need, then what are you waiting for?? Let me help you yourself today!


Carney, D. R., Cuddy, A. J. C., & Yap, A. J. (2015). Review and Summary of Research on the Embodied Effects of Expansive (vs. Contractive) Nonverbal Displays. Psychological Science, 26(5), 657–663.

Grebelsky-Lichtman, T. (2017). Verbal versus nonverbal primacy: Children’s response to parental incongruent communication. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 34(5), 636–661.

Puccinelli, N. M., Andrzejewski, S. A., Markos, E., Noga, T., & Motyka, S. (2013). The value of knowing what customers really want: The impact of salesperson ability to read non-verbal cues of affect on service quality. Journal of Marketing Management, 29(3–4), 356–373.

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